Wednesday, July 23, 2008

The Dragon In My Garage

An interesting parable about science, faith and skepticism by my bro Carl Sagan.
The Dragon In My Garage
by
Carl Sagan

"A fire-breathing dragon lives in my garage"
Suppose (I'm following a group therapy approach by the psychologist Richard Franklin) I seriously make such an assertion to you. Surely you'd want to check it out, see for yourself. There have been innumerable stories of dragons over the centuries, but no real evidence. What an opportunity!

"Show me," you say. I lead you to my garage. You look inside and see a ladder, empty paint cans, an old tricycle--but no dragon.

"Where's the dragon?" you ask.

"Oh, she's right here," I reply, waving vaguely. "I neglected to mention that she's an invisible dragon."

You propose spreading flour on the floor of the garage to capture the dragon's footprints.

"Good idea," I say, "but this dragon floates in the air."

Then you'll use an infrared sensor to detect the invisible fire.

"Good idea, but the invisible fire is also heatless."

You'll spray-paint the dragon and make her visible.

"Good idea, but she's an incorporeal dragon and the paint won't stick."

And so on. I counter every physical test you propose with a special explanation of why it won't work.

Now, what's the difference between an invisible, incorporeal, floating dragon who spits heatless fire and no dragon at all? If there's no way to disprove my contention, no conceivable experiment that would count against it, what does it mean to say that my dragon exists? Your inability to invalidate my hypothesis is not at all the same thing as proving it true. Claims that cannot be tested, assertions immune to disproof are veridically worthless, whatever value they may have in inspiring us or in exciting our sense of wonder. What I'm asking you to do comes down to believing, in the absence of evidence, on my say-so.

The only thing you've really learned from my insistence that there's a dragon in my garage is that something funny is going on inside my head. You'd wonder, if no physical tests apply, what convinced me. The possibility that it was a dream or a hallucination would certainly enter your mind. But then, why am I taking it so seriously? Maybe I need help. At the least, maybe I've seriously underestimated human fallibility.

Imagine that, despite none of the tests being successful, you wish to be scrupulously open-minded. So you don't outright reject the notion that there's a fire-breathing dragon in my garage. You merely put it on hold. Present evidence is strongly against it, but if a new body of data emerge you're prepared to examine it and see if it convinces you. Surely it's unfair of me to be offended at not being believed; or to criticize you for being stodgy and unimaginative-- merely because you rendered the Scottish verdict of "not proved."

Imagine that things had gone otherwise. The dragon is invisible, all right, but footprints are being made in the flour as you watch. Your infrared detector reads off-scale. The spray paint reveals a jagged crest bobbing in the air before you. No matter how skeptical you might have been about the existence of dragons--to say nothing about invisible ones--you must now acknowledge that there's something here, and that in a preliminary way it's consistent with an invisible, fire-breathing dragon.

Now another scenario: Suppose it's not just me. Suppose that several people of your acquaintance, including people who you're pretty sure don't know each other, all tell you that they have dragons in their garages--but in every case the evidence is maddeningly elusive. All of us admit we're disturbed at being gripped by so odd a conviction so ill-supported by the physical evidence. None of us is a lunatic. We speculate about what it would mean if invisible dragons were really hiding out in garages all over the world, with us humans just catching on. I'd rather it not be true, I tell you. But maybe all those ancient European and Chinese myths about dragons weren't myths at all.

Gratifyingly, some dragon-size footprints in the flour are now reported. But they're never made when a skeptic is looking. An alternative explanation presents itself. On close examination it seems clear that the footprints could have been faked. Another dragon enthusiast shows up with a burnt finger and attributes it to a rare physical manifestation of the dragon's fiery breath. But again, other possibilities exist. We understand that there are other ways to burn fingers besides the breath of invisible dragons. Such "evidence"--no matter how important the dragon advocates consider it--is far from compelling. Once again, the only sensible approach is tentatively to reject the dragon hypothesis, to be open to future physical data, and to wonder what the cause might be that so many apparently sane and sober people share the same strange delusion.

Wednesday, November 28, 2007

Anxiety + Republican Debate

I get intense anxiety in situations I feel are awkward. I had to distance myself from 2 strangers in a Wawa when one said "So how are things?" (If anyone ever asks you this question, either walk away or pretend the person didn't ask it, it's a terrible question.)
So naturally tonight I watched the CNN-YouTube debate, which first off is an awful idea. I say this because the people who are educated and interested enough to submit a question to such a preliminary debate are the kind of people who think they are hilarious and clever, and usually aren't: Case in Point

The arguing in the beginning made me very uncomfortable, which made me question my interest in watching a debate in the first place. But for the sake of my education and my vote I survived. Mitt Romney looks the part, but I doubt he has the experience, plus he's an idiot. The two guys on the end (Hunter and something with a T), there was a reason for them being there. Giuliani sucked in the beginning but brought it back towards the end, still don't know how to feel there. McCain is so into Iraq he should probably run for president there. Huckabee was very Christian, but he spoke well and had very clear views. Fred Thompson... And Ron Paul probably doesn't have a shot in hell but he's got some great views, and he'll have my vote if he gets nominated (www.ronpaul2008.com).

So overall it was a waste of 2 hours I could have been playing Mario Galaxy.

Stupid Fat Idiot Cat

I live in a house where at any one time you'll see about 3 or 4 cats walking around. Probably around 8 total. And I just can't understand how anyone would want this thing walking around their house:



This thing would never last in my house, because if I saw it in the night, I'd probably act on instinct and kill it. Either that or run and pee myself in the safety of my bed. Ugh it's so menacing.

Monday, October 8, 2007

Finally the future is here.




What you see above is a new proposed currency for intergalactic travelers for use in the outer space. This was developed because earth money has been deemed unsuitable for extraterrestrial conditions. The new unit is the QUID and it's equal to about 6.25 british pounds.

Okay, I could care less what these things are worth, get rid of all earth currency and let's just use these things. They look like toys, and who doesn't love toys. Nazis, that's who. And also, grown ups. Imagine how bad ass you'd look whipping these bad boys out to pay for dinner. Keep the change my friend, I've got a QUIDflow like no other.

And so it begins

I'm not really sure where this is going, but hang on.